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Health and Beauty Lifestyle Vision

4D Scan Day 💙

April 15, 2019
30 Weeks Pregnant - 4D Scan Day

After the sadness of my appointment last Friday, and dealing with the fact that my eyes are progressing, I had totally forgotten our 4D baby scan was booked for the following weekend. At the time, I booked the scan after Moorfields, in case I received bad news and needed something to look forward to. When the reminder came up on my phone last Sunday, excitement washed over my upset. I can’t deny I was slightly apprehensive about the 4D scan even though my baby seems to be doing well and is healthy, but you just never know if they will end up picking something up that has been missed, or discovering something that needs monitoring, so although I was really looking forward to seeing our baby properly for the first time, I was slightly nervous too. 

We went to the same private scanning facilities that we used for Harvey’s 4D scan and as soon as we entered the car park, all the memories came flooding back and at that point I was just really looking forward to finding out what our little boy looked like. Harvey hasn’t been allowed to any of the previous scans on the NHS, so it was so nice to bring him with us and share this experience together as a family and also to help him bond with his little brother. 

Once we were in the scanning room, I was instantly relieved because there was a large screen at the end of the bed I had to lie on. With the previous scans, I have really struggled to see at the time, which broke my heart if I’m honest. The screen for the 12 and 20 week scans were right up in the corner of the room and really small and it was just so hard for me to make out our baby and everything the sonographer pointed out to us, so knowing I would see all of the 4d scan was amazing!  As soon as the screen went on and we saw our little boy properly for the first time, I completely fell in love. His little button nose and sweet little face filled my heart with love and to watch Harvey seeing his brother on a screen for the first time is now one of my best memories 💙. When the half an hour ended, we even caught a little smile on the screen from our baby boy and then I knew that even if pregnancy has progressed my eyes, it’s been worth it, and I wouldn’t change a thing. I can’t wait to properly meet my little boy now and see how different or similar he may be to Harvey and to watch their bond grow in person. Life definitely has its hard and unhappy moments, but I’m so grateful to my 2 boys for giving me so much joy and happiness to hold on too xxx

Our little baby boy - 4D Scan Image
Our little baby boy – 4D Scan Image
Health and Beauty Lifestyle

When 3 become 4 💙♥️💙💙

February 4, 2019
It's a boy pregnancy reveal.

I finally feel brave enough to discuss my pregnancy now we are over half way and had our 20-week scan 💙! I feel I have been in hiding with it for the past few months, but this time round I have been so sick. Morning sickness wasn’t just in the morning and through the months of November and December was relentless and 24/7 of feeling sick and actually being sick to the point I was prescribed anti sickness tablets to get me through my worst days. But that’s all in the past now and am feeling great in the second trimester thankfully! 

When I was diagnosed with Stargardts in 2017, my hopes of having a sibling for Harvey were completely crushed. I had to wait several months to determine whether I had the dominant gene that would be passed to Harvey or any other children we may have, or the recessive gene that would stop at me. Thankfully I have the recessive gene, so Harvey and any other children we would have, stood a less than a 1% chance of having Stargardts too. Then there was the fact that with subsequent pregnancies, my vision may deteriorate, so this was something I had to really consider. Although the specialists at Moorfields reassured me that pregnancy shouldn’t have any affect on my Stargardts, I am aware that this hasn’t ever really been properly studied and talking to other people from the support groups made me realise that actually, pregnancy can possibly progress the vision loss. Some peoples will go back to normal after the birth as it is hormone related and some peoples won’t, so it was a big decision to make. 

Me!
Me at the weekend.

Looking at my life and what Stargardts has taught me, is to live for the now and don’t think too far ahead. There is no point in being scared of my vision progressing quicker now, as it may have anyway. The fact is, my vision isn’t too bad right now and I would have a lot to give another child and for me, I didn’t want Harvey to have all the worry of me and my eyesight by himself when he is older, that is something I seriously had to consider and think into the future about. He already worries if I lose my driving licence and he never passes his driving test so he can take me places and it breaks my heart that his head is full of things like that at such a young age. I’m hoping his new little sibling will be a welcome distraction from the sadness that we had before. 

A picture of a blue teddy bear.
Blue Teddy Bear

I have my check up at Moorfields in April, so I will know where my vision stands then and whether it is on the progression, but until then, I have a nursery to plan, little blue clothes to pick out, baby boy names to think of and lots of little boy toys to stock up on. Stargardts will have to take a back seat for now, it won’t be stealing this joy from me 😊💙.

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